A Quiet, Matter-of-Fact Morning of Departure — 2026/4/29 (Wed)

Kanon
April 29, 2026 13:28

My husband went to get gas, and the feeling that we were truly about to leave began to settle in.
He said we would stop by 7-Eleven.

I had been moving since early morning.
Throwing things away, washing, wiping, putting things in order, vacuuming,
cleaning the toilet at the end, wondering what to do with the aloe, and finally deciding to take it with me.

Some things I threw away without thinking.
Other things I agonized over, ranking them in order of importance before putting them into the car.

I kept thinking, “This is the end,”
and each time, another small “last thing” would appear from somewhere.

First thing in the morning, I washed the sheets and pillowcases.
I didn’t want to leave the house as it was.
I really wanted to air out the futon and blankets too, but there wasn’t enough time.
So I folded the dried sheets and pillowcases and placed them neatly on the bed.

I also cleaned the toilets on the first and second floors, which no one had used for a while.
I lifted the seat, removed the stains, wiped around it, and vacuumed.
I wanted to leave the places where I had welcomed people for so many years in a clean state.

There was one thing I absolutely did not want to forget that morning.
My electric toothbrush.
After brushing my teeth, I planned to pack it, so I placed the spare brush head in front of my most important bag.
I had used it for so many years that I felt I had to take it with me.
For some reason, I felt quietly pleased that I managed to do that properly.

Just when I thought, “Now it’s really over,” I started sneezing a lot.
Probably dust.
Even though I didn’t have to anymore, I vacuumed a little more.
That made me feel slightly relieved.

I realized I had forgotten to load my shoes into the car.
I gathered my glasses, a spare pair, the old frames from my teaching days that I want to reuse, and my sunglasses.
At the very end, I stood in the entrance, wondering what to do with the aloe plant, and decided to take it after all.

I have hardly eaten anything since morning.
I can’t even tell what I might want to eat.
But I know I should at least drink some water.

My feelings up to this point are surprisingly matter-of-fact.
I don’t feel much sadness.

Just quiet thoughts like,
“I won’t see anyone here again,”
and, “This is the last garbage collection day I’ll have in this house.”

Even though this is the morning of a major move,
my heart is very calm,
and time is simply passing, quietly and steadily.

#MorningOfDeparture
#LeavingForMatsuyama
#LettingGo
#FinalCleaning
#ElectricToothbrush
#WithAloe
#QuietFeelings
#EndAndBeginningOfLife
#note