【EN】Searching for Senon Wakamiya

By Senon Wakamiya
【EN】

Senon Wakamiya. It’s an honor to meet you. I’m Karl Schmidt Daniel from Germany. I’m a freelance reporter.

“Uh… what? Why are you coming at me out of nowhere. I’m just a regular guy. Stop. This is seriously scary.”

Your gogyōka has just won Italy’s most prestigious honor: the Golden Piglet Award. How do you feel, honestly?

“I didn’t even apply. How come?”

It seems your family secretly submitted it for you.

“Is this some 80s idol storyline? That makes no sense. Why would they hide it from me?”

Senon Wakamiya—across Western Europe and South America, there’s no one who doesn’t know your name. Your name and your gogyōka have spread worldwide.

“Even if you tell me that all of a sudden… Oh—so that’s why I’ve been getting a ton of foreign-language spam lately? Deleting it is a pain, you know.”

Your gogyōka has gained a feverish following in South America. Young people rushed to bookstores for your book—so many that it escalated into a riot in front of a shop.

“I haven’t published any book, so there’s no way they’re selling it. Of course they’d get mad. But why a riot? Even if it existed, just buy it on Amazon.”

Ah—Amazon. South America. Nice.

“Don’t act like that was my joke. Why are you laughing? It’s not funny at all.”

The gogyōka that sparked the riot… may I recite it here?

“No, don’t. A white guy I just met reading what I wrote—right here in the middle of town—this is so embarrassing. Please stop.”

Ogiwara
or Hagiwara
either one is fine
right now
kiss me here

“Wait, that caused the riot? Why? I had better ones! And that one’s basically half stolen from a comedian and half from a singer. That’s bad.”

With this poem, you won the Golden Piglet Award by unanimous vote.

“What even is the Golden Piglet Award? I’ve never heard of it. What kind of award is that?”

The ceremony is tomorrow, of course you’ll attend, right? How do you feel right now?

“You’re telling me this out of nowhere. At the very least, you gotta tell me a month in advance. I can’t just skip work tomorrow.”

Tomorrow’s presenter will be last year’s winner—Paul McCartney.

“Paul McCartney won last year? There’s a difference between Paul and me like a god and a quail. I’m too scared to go.”

By the way, the winner two years ago was Manny Pacquiao.

“Now I understand even less what this award is. Pacquiao’s a boxer. None of these dots connect.”

Senon Wakamiya—may I take a photo? I want to photograph you with the town where your gogyōka was born in the background.

“Sure, I guess.”

Great—let’s do it.

“Oh—I’m the one taking the photo? So you don’t want a picture with me. You want me to be the photographer. You don’t even like me.”

Thank you. This will be a great memory. I’ll come again next week. I’m looking forward to your latest work.

“Why are you coming back?”

(End)

SENON ARCHIVE -まとめのまとめ-

Contents (EN)
① Gogyouka (Five-Line Poems)
② Transformation Begins in the Body (walking / meals / notebook)
③ Sergei (dialogue series)
④ Dialogues & Inner Comedy
⑤ Declaration / Meta

Index (EN):

GOGYŌKA-EN

他言語版 / Other languages

【JP】Japanese:

【PT-BR】Português (Brasil)：

【ES】Español：

【FR】Français：